The CIA Replaces Waterboarding With Javascript Coding During Interrogations, Causing Backlash From Human-Rights Organizations

GUANTANAMO — After the use of waterboarding became a matter of public controversy in the United States during the War on Terror in the 2000s, the CIA has recently authorized the use of a so-called “enhanced interrogation technique” which—according to a top-secret memo leaked to the press—consists in providing prisoners with a laptop and the task to code in pure Javascript in a text editor, with the cruel option of having the freedom to choose among hundreds of frameworks with poor documentation, all claiming to come solve the exact same problem. “The new technique proves to be more inhuman and degrading than any other technique up to date, and it should be called what is is: absolute, cruel torture” stated Meredith McAllister, spokesperson for Human Rights Watch. “It is unacceptable that these kinds of things still happen in 2022” she concluded.