DoD’s 800-Billion Dollars Budget For 2022 Already Spent In Powerpoint Slides And Frameworks, Audit Says

WASHINGTON DC — An audit from the US Government Accountability Office (GAO) found that only two months and a half into the year, the Department of Defense has already spent all of its nearly trillion-dollar budget in powerpoint slides with colorful, semantically-broken block diagrams and a creeping variety of frameworks, including tooling needed for creating the diagrams and the certifications which provide sought-after post-nominal letters such as PRINCE2, ITIL, PMP, LSSBB, and similar. “As of today, the entirety of the Department and all armed forces are exclusively working on producing slides with ininteligible graphical depictions while maniacally consuming courses of an ecosystem of faddish frameworks with their subsequent must-have multi-level certifications attached” the audit report says. Meanwhile, budgetary constraints have already starting manifesting as shortages of essential elements like hand soap, toilet paper and medium-yield nuclear bombs have been spotted in different areas of the Pentagon.