SpaceX to Ramp Up Raptor Production by Acquiring Undisclosed South American Country to Enslave It

WASHINGTON – An undisclosed South American country has been fully acquired by SpaceX, according to sources related to the matter. A spokesperson from the company did not reveal further details but commented that is a “30-something million country, they have their own flag, their own anthem, their own depreciated currency”. This acquisition is closely related to the fact Raptor engine production was not fast enough to support Starship plans, putting the whole company at risk of bankruptcy, as a leaked email from SpaceX’s CEO, Elon Musk, showed. The strategy behind purchasing a full third-world country appears to be related to the fact citizens of such nations are more used to work overtime for no compensation, during weekends and while being ill.
Later on the day, Elon Musk tweeted: “Great deal, they’re cheap, and even the children have an ok sense of quality.”

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